The Glasses that Wouldn’t Die… and then they did.

It’s random anecdote time…

Once upon a time (about one year ago) I bought a pair of sunglasses. They cost me $7 from TjMaxx. They were tortoise colored, slightly cat eyed, and a brand not worth remembering (since I can’t remember the brand). They were plastic and had little expected out of them.

My sensitive eyes gave need to these glasses nearly every single day, sometimes even at night if my computer screen was too bright. Yes, wearing glasses indoors is strange.  When I wasn’t wearing my sunglasses they lived at the bottom of my purse, along with random receipts, pencils, and packs of crackers (?).  Every time I blindly fished around my purse while squinting in the sun, I always thought I’d find my sunglasses in parts, or at least bent or scratched.  This was never the case.  Day after day they came out whole, ready for duty. I was beginning to think I had stumbled upon magical sunglasses.

About a month ago while riding the bus, I ran into a friend. So caught up in being amazed that I actually ran into a friend, (note: I still feel new to Boston and with few friends, so the odds of running into one should be slim to none) I got off the bus without my glasses. The loss struck hard and fast. Then I rationalized the situation: A) They didn’t cost me much so it’s not worth worrying about,  B) it was amazing I didn’t lose them sooner and C) I’ve been wanting a new style of sunglasses for awhile so losing them gave me an excuse to buy a new pair.  I continued on with an optimistic attitude.

About an hour later, I caught the bus to get back home. Now, there’s many buses that run along a single route, for routes can be 20 miles long and have pickups every 15 minutes, so when I caught, literally- the same bus back to go home, it was a true coincidence.  The driver recognized me, asked if I had lost my sunglasses- I, stunned, simply nodded yes- and he handed me my once lost glasses.

Three weeks went by, with me and my sunglasses coexisting as before. That was until a fateful visit to Au Bon Pain in Harvard Square. I have the bladder of an 80 year old (no offense to 80 year olds) and have to pee all the time. You can probably see where this is going. Or maybe not. Probably not. So I made my way to the bathroom, and no sooner was I trying to get over the intense, infamous, city public bathroom smell-  I dropped my sunglasses into the toilet.

There was really only 1 of 2 things to do. 1) Convince myself that I didn’t have to pee that bad and leave the glasses for someone else to deal with or 2) Fish the glasses out of the toilet, so at least no one would try to flush them and clog the plumbing. And no, there was no 3) Fish out the glasses, clean them, and wear them once again.  Few things are worth such limits.

So, I crossed myself (metaphorically, because I’m not sure how to actually cross myself), closed my eyes, and dove my hand into the cold, stainless steel bowl.  Within .5 seconds, I had my sunglasses out of the toilet bowl and on the ground, where they remained. Two minutes later, hands washed 4 times and sanitized heavily, I exited the bathroom and never looked back. My sunglasses had finally succumbed to my inevitable klutziness.

I went to the store today to replace those sunglasses. I settled on $10 Oscar de la Rentas, but if I’m being honest, nothing quite matched up to my previous ones. I must have tried on 30 sunglasses (and momentarily thought about the potential of catching pink eye when trying on glasses) before settling on one. I realized that I had taken my previous sunglasses for granted and should have treated them better, bought an eye glass case for them, paid attention more… This time it will be different. This time, if I drop them in the toilet, they’re staying there.

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